Contentment

Over the course of the last day or so, this has been rolling around in my brain. My family was in town this weekend, and it took everything in me to not make it a giant vent fest. I mean there was a lot of venting, but the more the weekend progressed, the more convicted I was to STOP. My life right now is hard.

I'm a perfectionist who doesn't feel like she is good at what she does.

I don't get to hang out with my friends during the week because I go to bed at 10pm.

I struggle with knowing what the heck I'm supposed to do with my life.

I don't spend nearly enough time with the Lord.

I am surrounded by people who LOVE what they do, and I want that for myself.

But here's the thing I realized. I am so lucky. I have a job that pays really well. I don't have to worry about going out to eat occasionally, or even buying new clothes from my favorite stores. I have amazing friends who will hang out whenever I can and still call even if they know I'm probably going to say no to whatever is going on that particular evening. I have a crazy supportive and helpful staff where I work. I have so much going for me and still I struggle. With being content. And happy. Right where I am. So I'm going to start trying to be more thankful. For me and my overly-pessimistic self, this is going to be tough, but I'm going to make an effort.

I'm going to strive for joy and peace in the midst of (what feels like) trials.

And at the very least try to not yell at my 4th period class...

"I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:12b-13